Putney Heath Area Guide

Clinton Baptiste is the useless clairvoyant medium psychic from Peter Kay's smash hit comedy Phoenix Nights. Fresh from another sell-out UK tour, he's back to deliver the best of his recent work, plus some new bits. Join Clinton for his stories, jokes plus demonstrations of his amazing ability - and as always he'll be in the audience to give you truthful (but startling) readings from the spirit world! Not for the faint hearted.

Oh, it’s all there! All the trademarks are in evidence in Ardal’s latest show. Beautifully crafted stand-up comedy? Yes. Celebrated use of language? Tick. Lateral thinking, surreal flourishes, sharp observations? Of course. As for the occasional profundity? Maybe. Despite his best attempts over many decades to put the world to rights, it is still a colossal mess. And so, Ardal has no choice but to go out on the road again. Like the good comedy doctor he is, he fearlessly diagnoses the various pathologies and neuroses that are currently ravaging humanity. Disclaimer: No solutions provided. After an alarming experience at the supermarket, Ardal reflects on who he is as a man and a comedian. He examines his own ethnic and religious background, and thinks twice about the very core of his identity as a voice of reason. Is everything a big lie? With no major trauma of his own to draw on for material, apart from the drag of getting older, he also turns his gaze outwards at the joys and follies of contemporary life. Towel Animals? A.I.? Chair Yoga? Cauliflower as a main course? Yes. Yes. Yes. And Yes. No current idiocy is left unexamined. With a highly developed sense of the ridiculous, and proper comedy bones, NOT HIMSELF, is a testament to the healing power of humour. And the joy of jokes.

Join our loveable hero Jack as he embarks on a mission of gigantic proportions, way into the clouds, to defeat his newfound nemesis and save the people of Hammersmith.

Stardew Valley: Symphony of Seasons Join us on a musical journey from your first day in the valley all the way to your arrival to the summit, with the brand new Stardew Valley concert Symphony of Seasons! Curated personally by Stardew Valley creator and composer ConcernedApe, Symphony of Seasons features a 35-piece orchestra performing the most memorable music from the game, and a screen above the stage playing gameplay footage plus original content created exclusively for this tour. Concert-goers can look forward to hearing the game's most cherished songs as they watch their farm grow throughout the seasons and explore some of the valley’s most memorable locations, from Pelican Town to the Skull Cavern, Ginger Island to Calico Desert, the Submarine to the Wizard's Tower and much more.

Saturday 15 November – Sunday 18 January Recommended for ages 6-12 Tickets from £10 (Group and multi-buy offers available) £2.50 transaction fee applies to phone and online bookings. T&Cs apply. Schools tickets from £10 (11th ticket free) Approx. 1hr 20 mins (including interval) Lila dreams of becoming a Master Firework-Maker just like her father. However, to become one, she must go on an epic journey that will push her to her limits. Only then can she discover the closely guarded secret to becoming a true firework master. But when her father’s life depends on her winning the firework competition and pulling off the best display the world has ever seen, can Lila’s skills save the day and light up the skies? Join Lila on the quest of a lifetime as she faces friend and foe on her illuminating journey of self-discovery. Polka Theatre present a brand-new production directed by Lee Lyford, based on the much-loved, award-winning book by Philip Pullman. This is a brand-new production and information on the show may change.

To celebrate the release of ‘The Insider's Guide to Inside No. 9’, Steve Pemberton and Reece Shearsmith will be taking to the stage for an informative and hilarious guide to the creation of their Bafta award-winning comedy anthology.